What just happened.

I’ve got kids. I’ve had them for awhile now. Luke is going to be twelve this summer. I named him Luke partly so that I could say, “Luke, I am your father,” but also a little bit because there was a Bible verse in the Book of Luke that I liked, and that had been the first piece of scripture I’d memorized after a dramatic born-again experience that I’d had in high school, which I do think that there were very real and good aspects of, while at the same time not wanting to minimize the fact that it had been catalyzed at least in part by my having done altogether too many drugs during adolescence. Nothing cool about that, but I do want to be fully honest about it because I am primarily interested in processing and communicating the truth.

Abby is thirteen and a half, and I have almost adjusted to having a teenager, I think. I basically need to be really patient and understanding with her, and to not take it personally when she acts like a teenager. I am using the word teenager in a conscious effort to be more kind, because teenager is a very mild word, and will not be interpreted to contain any connotations that are too overly negative. Being kind helps when it comes to having a teenager. It helps a lot more than I thought it was going to before I tried it, I do have to admit. It’s not always easy, but it helps so much.

My wife and I had decided to start a family right away as soon as we got married. There wasn’t a lot of thought put into it, but I love my kids and I’m glad we decided to bring them into the world. I think that when all is said and done it was a good call, and that the world is a better place with them in it, for sure.

The longer I proceed further into this dimension of existence that is the space-time environment in which I find myself, the more I find it to be a true and real thing about life, this idea that being kind is just sort of the secret to unlocking the best version on a lot more of a given person’s interpersonal levels, or whatever the right way to say that is. I am pretty sure I’ve said everything in this paragraph so far in an incorrect way as far as English is concerned, but that’s okay because I am young and I am still learning. To talk.

My point is, though, that I’ve learned a lot through the experience of having kids. I will let you guys ponder the stunning depth and originality of this revelation while I think of some more words. These words will not happen until later, though. For this, I am sorry.



By Ben Wolf

It's a secret!

2 replies on “What just happened.”

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