I’m Already Dead

Only death can accomplish the type of change that needs to happen in the human heart, and only one specific death, at that: the death of Adoni. This was the only human death capable of resulting in resurrection life, and it was accomplished vicariously for me, and for you, so that we might tear through the remnants and echoes of this mortal coil, and emerge from the ashes victorious. It is in this way – in this impossible dance of the Spirit, allowing life to breathe hope into our dying flesh – that we must partner with death. It is only through this death we learn what living really is.

There is a type of life that can be found in much of what we are able to access here in this place, normally and naturally. This natural life may be unspeakably wonderful at times, even so much so that we will find all the peace and joy we’ve ever thought we were looking for. But we were designed for something more. We were created to experience the supernatural. We all long for it. This longing expresses itself everywhere throughout recorded human history, except in the places where bitterness and resentment have given way to disillusionment. Hope deferred makes the heart sick, and this is a sick, broken world. We all know that, too. We know it so well.

In order to step into the moment in such a way that I am experiencing supernatural freedom, I must die to the things that I think I need in order to be happy. I must allow these desires to be consumed in the flames of the trials and tribulations of the present darkness in which we find ourselves needing to survive. It is ironic that survival can only be accomplished by dying, but irony seems to be par for the course here in this place. As this death is accomplished, though, by and by I will see the fulfillment of those needs, and that happiness, in ways far more perfect than any which I would ever have been capable of choosing or orchestrating on my own, without God.

And so I submit to the process. It is necessary, and the results will be worth it. This is what I have chosen to believe, not out of outward compulsion, but because I find it welling up within me. I cannot suppress it. I cannot deny it. It is just who I am now.

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