Mental illness and religious abuse converged upon my life at an unfortunately early age. Later in life, during my early adulthood, this pattern emerged once again. It became something of a recurring theme, the side effects of mental trauma sort of echoing down through everything, creating a filter of negativity that I have come through trial and error to understand that I must work towards deliberately letting go of, as it creates all kinds of problems in general. I don’t know if I could have worded that any more poorly. I’m thinking maybe not. But I’m going to leave it like that for now, because I am the boss of me.
This blog serves as a sort of personal journal to document the ongoing recovery process from this particular amalgam of psychological damages.
Basically, when I finally hit absolute bottom, and realized that I was either going to actively engage in the recovery process or wind up dead as a result of chemical dependency, I began scouring the Internet for resources. I Googled everything I could think of.
“Recovery from Bible-based mind control.”
“Surviving cult abuse.”
“I drink because I feel like, no matter what I do, I fail really hard, and somewhere deep inside I seem to believe that God hates me because of this.”
I mean, I Googled a whole ton of stuff, and while I did find a lot of resources that seemed very well put together, I just didn’t see anything that really seemed to apply to my situation in any meaningful way.
That’s how this site was born. Who knows? Someday it might actually become a real website with stuff to do and things to see! For now, though, it simply serves as my own little weird corner of the Internet, where I go to write stuff down from time to time.
I hope you enjoy it!